Win Friends and Expand Your Network

by Caroline Levchuck

Do you freeze when someone invites you to a networking event? Do you groan at the mere mention of the word networking?

Networking isn't about artificial settings or immediately asking someone at a professional event for a job. Rather, in the truest sense of the word, networking is about friendship and communication.

Your family, friends, and neighbors, and current and former coworkers are all part of your natural network. So is everyone you stay in contact with and show an interest in.

Reach Out and Touch Everyone

To have a friend, you must be a friend.

And to have a robust natural network filled with friends, you've got to be a thoughtful friend. This means remembering people's birthdays and other important occasions. It means giving kudos for their accomplishments. It means sending thank-you notes for referrals or favors you receive.

It also means staying in regular contact through emails, phone calls, and get-togethers. Each week, set a goal to send one friendly unsolicited email to someone who's in your network (or someone you'd like to be in your network). Also, make at least one personal phone call a week to another individual. Finally, at least once a month, arrange to meet someone in your natural network for lunch, cocktails, or just coffee.

If none of this comes naturally to you, make it a priority by putting each obligation on your to-do list.

You Wanna Be Starting Something

A great way to connect with people and, yes, network, is at an event. But rather than attending yet another formal-but-worthless gathering, get people together informally, and for fun.

Start a weekly poker game. Start a book club with coworkers. Start a cooking club. Start a band.

Have a dinner party or a backyard BBQ. Invite your guests to each bring another friend who's not part of your immediate circle.

Arrange a potluck lunch at the office. Initiate a walking group with coworkers during the day. Spearhead a company outing or fundraiser.

Initiating group activities allows you to network organically while having fun.

Oh the Places You'll Go

Joining is as important as initiating. What are your natural interests? Follow them to expand your natural network.

Do you like to golf? Rather than playing with your usual partner, walk on to a course as a single and play with a threesome. You could make three new friends -- and add three new members to your network.

Have you always been interested in pottery? Or learning sign language? Take a course after work. You'll be with a group of like-minded folks from all walks of life. Odds are at least one or two will wind up members of your network.

Joining a gym, a special interest group, or getting involved with local politics are all great ways to meet new people and make new friends.

Become the Ultimate Connector

One of the best ways to be a good friend and great natural networker is to become a connector.

Rather than focusing on how people in your network and new friends can help you, focus on how you can help them. Keep your ears open when someone says they're looking to break into a certain industry or they're seeking someone with specialized knowledge. Who in your network can help? Who in your network would benefit from such an opportunity?

Becoming the ultimate connector may not bear immediate fruit for you and your professional ambitions. But when you need it, you will have a flourishing network to lend you a hand.